I’m over it. Finally.

So it’s been a minute. Lots of things have happened. Things none of you really care about. But I’m here to say…. I’m over it. I’m over him. I AM OVER HIM! And that, my friends, is what you call CLOSURE!

Healing.

It’s been one week. It’s been one week since Mr. Mysterious told me he wasn’t in love with me and didn’t know if he ever would be. I know none of you want to hear any sappy details so I won’t go there. It’s been a long week. We were supposed to spend Valentine’s weekend together so that whole two days felt like one giant roller coaster. I would feel better and the next moment I would fall apart. Now I suppose I have reached a turning point. He has been ignoring me. He doesn’t seem to want to talk to me at all even though I am not the one who ended it. I will be here when he is ready. I will be here if he ever decides that he can love me the way he says he wants to. I will be here to be his friend. However, I will not plague myself any longer. I will not make any more attempts at contacting him. He has my number. When he is past this, he can call. I still hurt. I still miss him everyday. But I will not let my wound fester. I have to let it heal.

Exhaustion is me.

So I was going to really try and do P90X straight through the 90 days but alas I am not in that good of shape. So today, which should be day three, is going to be break day. I think I’ll just go to the gym for some light cardio. The reason for this is that my arms and back are still so sore from day one that I fear after the Arm and Shoulder work out I am supposed to do today, my arms will just give out on me, and that would be bad. 

 

Busy day tomorrow. My day off work will be spent job hunting and trying to figure out how financially screwed I am because I chose to get an education. I suppose it will all work out. 

I’ll be back soon but if you will please excuse me, my cat is climbing up somewhere she shouldn’t be…..

I. Am. So. Predictable.

I knew this would happen. I went on hiatus….again, but now that I have had my heart broken and have no more boyfriend to tie up all my time I have made some resolutions to myself. First and foremost I have to start focusing on my career. In order to do this without worrying about money every. single. day. I am probably going to be moving back into my parents house. This decision is not final but I have been turning it over and over in my mind. 

 

I’m so disappointed in myself for not focusing on my career earlier but I have always done this. I let myself get so tied up in a relationship that I put other things on the back burner. That stops now. I plan on putting all the energy that I put into my relationship into other things. 

 

Okay, second of all I am putting more focus on my fitness. This is another thing I have done over and over again. I try to focus on it and then I let it go. Well I bought P90X and I am on day two. I am more sore than I have ever been but I feel amazing!

 

Last, and by no means least, I want to blog. Not only will blogging improve my writing but I will be able to build a network of people outside of my friends in Real Life. So here it goes people! Let’s get excited!

Once More With Feeling…

I have done this before. Registered a blog, picked a background, written for a while and abandoned said blog. I loved the last blog I had but I fell out of touch. It was no longer who I was. I am always changing.

So now I’m back and I have had quite the summer. I began the summer moving into an apartment with a boyfriend who I cared about very much. I knew the relationship was wavering and I thought I could make it work. Eventually, however, I realized I could not make myself feel something that just wasn’t there anymore. As my mom says, he just wasn’t “The One.”

So now I live alone. With my cat. I am the Cat Lady. No not quite because I am pretty sure the Cat Lady has a minimum of five cats and after my ex boyfriend takes his half, I will just have the one.

So now that I live alone, I need more outlets. I started painting again, which is something I abandoned a long time ago and have been meaning to get back into. I need to start running again. And I am blogging again. Perhaps this time I can keep it together.

I’ll warn you, I blog at random and about random things. It could be one sentence about my mental health status for the day or it could be a 200 word essay on how Buffy the Vampire Slayer changed my life. You never know. Right now I am just enjoying the single college life. Dating is interesting. School is stressful and I am happy. Besides now I know blogging is in my genes. You will have to read my mom’s blog to see that. If you know me personally I only ask that you try not to look at the pictures of five-year-old-me in the bathtub. Thanks.

See you around.