You are currently browsing the category archive for the 'Crazy Moments' category.
Raise your hand if you have a Myspace? No one? That’s because you are not a loser like me. Well let me tell, Myspace has a lot of handy little features. One they added recently is this fun little box that tells you who you should be friends with because Myspace has noticed that you have friends in common. This is kind of fun. I mean I have found some long lost friends because of it. Well lately it has just been a pain in my ass and this is why….
The ex’s new girl toy is friends with like five of my friends so Myspace thinks it is Very Important that we become friends. In fact, Myspace thinks it is so important that every fucking time I log in that little box says that I should add her. I DON’T WANT TO ADD HER! I wish that Myspace would respect this decision and leave me alone. That is all.
Let us all take a brief moment to appreciate the utterly stupid state of worry one can go into when one’s significant other suddenly changes some random pattern of behavior.
Take today, for instance. I got up and went about my day as usual. Work. Class. And then I decided to see when Mr. Mysterious ( I’m calling him that now since everyone else gets to call their “others” some cute name. Ben what does newf mean?) is working. So I text him.
“Are you working today?”
I then continue about my day. Lunch with friend. Oil change in car. Buy cats new scratchy thingy so they will leave my couch the fuck alone. Nothing. So I text again to tell him I am heading home ( we live thirty minutes apart ) and to have a good evening. I drive home. I am fine up until this point when various Crazy Person Scenarios began to enter my head. I have listed them from Reasonable to Lock Her Up She’s Nuts and Has Lost All Grip With Reality and back to Reasonable.
Scenario One: He’s severely hungover and has been sleeping all day.
Scenario Two: He’s been in some sort of accident and can’t answer because of the body cast.
Scenario Three: His ex girlfriend showed up out of nowhere and now he is spending the whole day with her and not you.
Scenario Four: He was abducted by Aliens who took his phone to study our lame methods of communication.
Scenario Five: No seriously he’s probably sleeping.
So I text him again.
“I’m only slightly worried you are dead in a ditch somewhere. Give me a call to let me know you are alright when you get a chance”
Nothing. I call. Nothing. I wait. I call again. Nothing. I contemplate taking some sleeping pills just so I won’t have to think about it anymore. Finally he texts me back.
” Baby. I was sleeping. I felt like shit. Sorry for making you worry =(“
Okay fine. I was right the first and fifth times. I would like to add that I never once hyperventilated or cried which just goes to show that I am growing as a person. Either that or taking St. John’s Wort for “Mood Support” really does work. Does anyone else do this? Please say I’m not the only one.
